Christopher and I celebrated the anniversary of our first date this weekend. We had an awesome time and it’s been such a beautiful journey, but we started out in an long distance relationship. Here’s 10 tips to survive yours… (These are ideal for couples who started out as a LDR versus a couple who was already together when they had to do the long distance. )
- Have a realistic plan. Christopher lived in California when we met finishing school, the plan was as soon as he was finished he would move to Houston to be with me. This kept things in perspective for me and I knew I was not wasting time in a relationship that would always be long distance.
- Utilize technology! There are so many apps out there, use them! My favorites were Between and Couple. There’s a place to keep list (ie; wishlist ladies!) You can even do a thumb kiss, which is so cool when you can’t physically touch your partner. Skype of course. Avocado, Couple. Skype will also keep you from bein catfished!
- Rack up those miles! Phone calls are cool, skype sessions are awesome, but there’s nothing like touch! Christopher and I saw each other at least once a month. He was great about making sure that he either came here for a weekend or flew me to Cali to see him.
- Dedicate songs to each other. Google Play is great for this. Whenever we would dedicate songs to each other I would add them to a playlist on Google Play. That playlist now has almost 100 songs, and will be played during our wedding.
- Use the distance to get to know each other on a personal level Sometimes while dating we rush into sex prematurely. Since you can’t just “Netflix and Chill” use this time to TALK! and really get to know each other.
- Don’t talk on the phone every single day.Talking on the phone even when you have nothing to say leads to arguments or boredom. Yes, you should communicate each day, but keep calls short if you really don’t have anything to talk about. I remember feeling like Christopher and I were pulling apart from each other at times. It was because sometimes he wasn’t every talkative, but really his ass just didn’t have anything to say, and neither did I.
- Be open, honest, and trusting! No LDR will not work if you have trust issues, aren’t honest, or super needy. When your partner tells you that they are where they say they are, all you have is their word.
- Use this time to enjoy your alone time.Fart in the morning. Don’t shave your legs every day. Be sure to stay busy and get a hobby. If you stay busy this will keep you from constantly bugging your partner or being needy and annoying.
- Amazon Prime! Unexpected packages in the mail can really brighten your day when you ae missing your lover and with free shipping does it get any sweeter. Be cheesy, and send cute cards and gifts.
- Don’t expect support and excitement from your friends and family. Most people doubt LDRs so you may not receive the encouragement you are expecting. I was excited at first because, I really enjoy spending time alone and my own space. I was also on a journey where I was spending a lot of alone time to heal. My alone time was very important and I did not want to be suddenly bombarded with a relationship. When I told my friend that had just moved with her once LD beau, her response surprised me. I thought she would be excited until she said, “It sucks missing the person you love.” I was in bed crying my silly in love self to sleep one night, I remembered her words and couldn’t believe I wished this on myself. Thank God we are now together. I wish you all the success in your Long Distance Relationship.
- BONUS!! DO NOT SEND ANGRY LETTERS VIA SNAIL MAIL! JUST TEXT HIM. WHEN YOU MAKE UP A FEW HOURS LATER AND HE GETS YOUR LETTER A FEW DAYS LATER, IT MAY CAUSE ANOTHER PETTY ARGUMENT.
12. I also think that abstinence is important too. But I will save that for another post.